Fly Me to the Moon Review

Synopsis:
Three young flies set off on a courageous mission to become the first insects on the moon by hitching a ride on the historic Apollo 11 space flight. The year is 1969 and like everyone else in the world, Nat and his pals IQ and Scooter are abuzz over the upcoming launch of the first manned mission to the moon. Inspired by his Grandpa's oft-told tale of hiding aboard Amelia Earhart's plane during her famed solo cross-Atlantic flight, Nat hatches a secret plan for the three young flies to stow away on the Apollo 11 rocket. The hard part is keeping the plan secret from his mom, Mrs. McFly! When a N.A.S.A. Ground Control official catches sight of the three winged stowaways, he instructs the astronauts to store them in a test tube for later study. But after an electrical short causes the ship's engine to malfunction, the three intrepid insects manage to escape from their glass mini-brig just in time to discover the wiring problem and fix it. After a difficult lunar landing, Nat tags along with Neil Armstrong on his legendary moon walk. Although the flies face a few more close calls, the mission appears to be a success. At least until Grandpa's old flame Nadia arrives from Russia to warn him that her government, angry over losing the space race, has dispatched fly-spy Yegor to Cape Canaveral to sabotage the computer flight plans. With the Apollo hurtling toward Earth, it falls to Nat's family to save the mission--and the trio of brave flies--from disaster.

Review:
Rarely has there been a film where no one in my family can sit still through it. Where it is such an atrocity that I have actually begged for and wondered in anticipation for the movie to be over. I can only think of a couple times to be honest. When I saw Prince Caspian, It’s Pat – The Movie, and The Stupids. Those are all films where I thought I was literally going to try to find away to beat myself to death to keep from the horrible pain I was subjecting myself to. Well, I can now add Fly Me to the Moon to that short list.

This has got to be one of the most entertainmentless pieces of animated drivel to come out in what I would believe to be years. Possibly ever. I challenge you to try to get any child or yourself to sit through this without literally being tied down Clockwork Orange-style. I am in awe of how this ever was released in theaters.

There is nothing good in this film. I can’t think of one redeeming quality. The animation was subpar wanna-be Dreamworks / Disney tripe. I spent 45 minutes of the film trying to figure out when the actual story was going to start. I literally think that they FINALLY ended up in the spaceship with the astronauts (which is what the whole film is based on) maybe ¾’s of the way through the film. Every joke I saw fell flat. Every attempt at humor was like a giant THUD in a quite room.

I guess the studio thought this could possibly work because it was in 3-D. Well, good luck to them. It’ll NEVER work on DVD, even if you watch it on the hugest big-screen TV you could get your hands on. This is irredeemable, and that’s giving it too much credit. (Review by Eric Shirey)